Tuesday, January 30, 2007

A Sigh Of Relief

To all of you in blog land who were wondering what was going on with me in my life well here it is, a summary of the last 2 months.

The past 2 months has been a whirlwind of emotions, deadlines, projects and most of all stress.
First we had the ordination, that was a whole other full time job for me. Coordinating, planning, shopping, calls, mailings, etc. I was so happy when the day finally came and I was able to look back and say, "Dang I did good, thank God for all my friends who helped."
In the middle of all that craziness, the night before the ordination I got a call that my Grampa had passed away. The emotions were a little all over the place and honestly I didn't really grieve all that much. I had too much on my mind with the ordination and then once it had passed I fell into the state of, "did all this really happen?" I think I am still there, not coming to terms with the fact that I wont be able to see my Grandpa again in this lifetime. We were very close, I will always have fond memories of the time we spent together.
Then of course we had the Christmas holidays which are always busy, but always fun!
At Christmas I was told that for the rest of December and thru January I was going to be leading praise music, not only on Saturday nights with the youth, but on Sunday morning as well. I must say, I was a little shocked but I was up to the challenge, knowing I had VERY big shoes to fill. I am in no way a professional musician, I can sing and play the piano somewhat but I definitely cant be put into the "professional" box.
Leading worship was amazing, when I remembered to take my ADD meds! :)
There are things that I will miss and things I definitely wont. In a way I am glad I did this, I proved to myself that I can step up and lead music, with the help of some very talented musicians. I loved felling the Holy spirit move me as I lead and seeing it move others in the congragation. If nothing else I was truly blessed to be a part of that! With all the good comes bad and I was prepared for that too. I heard back handed comments, judgments, comparisons, etc. I tried not to let it bug me but there were times when it hit to deep and I went home crying. All in all this made me a better person. I grew in this experience whether it was good or bad. I am thankful that Fr Mski gave me the opportunity to grow and that he believed in me enough to let me go at it on my own.
New Years Eve was a blast, we had friends over and played board games and ate a ton of food. I attempted to cook my first turkey and passed the test, even though I cooked it upside down. My hubby has now hid the board games and probably wont let me play until next year. He says I am too competitive and that it gets annoying. Hey, what do you expect, I was a national swimmer who trained and competed for years. The competitive nature runs in my blood! Anyway, it was still so much fun.
The new year started off in a bad way, all of us got sick and were out of commission for several days. Hubby with a MS flare up and a nasty head cold, me with the stomach flu and nasty head cold and Noah with a virus of some sort. We recovered and then just when we thought we were on steady ground, Noah goes and "breaks" his arm. Off to the Er and DR's appointments until we hear, "Well maybe he really didn't break his arm. Lets take off the cast and see what happens over the next week." Praise the Lord! The follow up will be on Thursday and I will let you all know what they say.
Well that's it. **Sigh** Now I can go back to the way it was, at least for a little bit.


Blogger joannmski said...

What a time! Lots of stuff going on, to say the least. We were so blessed by your service, thank you for all your efforts.

5:58 PM  
Blogger glorygrl said...

Just to sing your praises:

THANK YOU from the bottoms of our hearts for taking on the music and giving us time to adjust to our new little boy.

YOU ARE AMAZING and God works through you. There is always someone with a bad attitude who says hurtful stuff, part of the unfortunate side-effect of serving God.

TAKE HEART, I always feel like the more crap the enemy slings, the more I see (later) that I was doing what God wanted and it pissed the devil off.

I was blessed by fortitude.

1:30 PM  
Blogger Recovering4Sqr said...

I would add "ditto" to what glorygrl wrote. Thank you!! Unfortunately, human nature being what it is, the back-handed "compliments", comparisons and at times the outright criticism and hostility are part of the whole thing called Music Ministry. However, you were right on point in your comment about feeling the Holy Spirit move through you and your music and seeing the people respond in worship. That is what it is all about, that is what gives one the strength to continue.

Music is a highly emotional art form; musicians pour everything into their art and place themselves and some of their vulnerabilities on display in front of everyone. A rather daunting prospect for anyone.

Keep up the good work and take heart. As the wife of an up and coming priest, you will undoubtedly spend a good deal of your time in music ministry. You are gifted in this area. As you are faithful and step out in this area, God will be faithful and meet you, giving you the grace and strength to deal with the "compliments" and other "words of encouragement" that you will receive. I could write a book about some of the stuff I have experienced.

Hang in there - you did a good job.

9:54 PM  
Blogger SinnerSaint said...

My built in music leader! No CD's for us when it's time! You and the music team were great - this little church is blessed with so many talented people. Great job Beautiful - you blessed God in your worship!

8:29 PM  
Blogger JessnBekahsmom said...

You did a FINE job, dear. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Those were some big shoes to fill (though I don't know the size of his feet) and you did very well. So, when someday you need to BE the music partner to your priest husband, you already know you can step into the roll and perform just fine. Just like we were blessed to have two priests for a season, and we didn't know why at the time, we are blessed to have a backup music team led by an up-and-coming music leader. Hip hip hooray!

4:25 PM  

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